To Conquer a Scot (A Time Traveler’s Highland Love) Page 24

  She hiccupped and he swore. To be the cause of her pain wasn’t something he’d ever thought to be. He loved her. Loved her so much that the severing pain was likely to rip him in two.

  He couldn’t listen to her crying so he strode out of his room, heading toward his sister’s quarters. He knocked loud on their door, pushing past Braxton when he finally opened it.

  “Do ye have any idea what you’ve done, lass? Abigail is now, right at this moment, sobbing, and there’s nothing I can do to help her. Why would ye bring her back to see what I’ve done?”

  “Because what you’ve done is a mistake.” Gwen swung out of bed and pulled a shawl about her shoulders. “Aline is poison for ye soul, while Abigail is the antidote. Do not marry, her, Aedan. You’ll regret it.”

  “If ye planned on bringing Abigail back why didn’t ye tell me? I would’ve waited for her. You knew how much I loved the lass.”

  “Loved? Does that mean you no longer do?” Gwen crossed her arms, one eyebrow raised.

  “I love her still and I canna have her. How do ye think that makes me feel? Makes us feel?”

  Gwen sighed. “When the announcement was made my decision was also. I swore on my daughter that should she have the gift, I’d pass down the story required for Abigail to return. I suppose by swearing that oath, I’ve also found out Mairi is gifted like her mama, for Abigail appeared like a ghost not long after.”

  Braxton went over and stood next to his wife, placing a comforting arm about her shoulders. “Are ye sure, Gwen?”

  “Aye, I’m sure,” Gwen said, kissing Braxton quickly before looking back at Aedan.

  “Well, I’m very happy for ye both, but it doesn’t change the mess you’ve made.”

  “I’ve never liked Aline and she knows this. She’s aware that I’d do anything to keep ye from making such a huge mistake. As for the rest of your future, it’s up to you, brother. Who will you choose?”

  “Choose? I’ve already chosen. I can’t go back on my word. The Grants are not a clan that we need to be at war with.” No matter how much he wanted to say the hell with everything required of him. To hell with everyone who expected him to do the right thing all the time.

  “Well, I suggest ye find another way, before it’s too late.”

  Aedan rubbed his neck, a headache thumping behind his brow. “Abigail will return to your estate with ye. I can’t have her here with me. It’s not safe.”

  Gwen raised her brow, grinning. “And why’s that? Don’t ye think you’d be able to keep ye hands off the lass?”

  He gritted his teeth. The urge to strangle his sister pulled at his soul. “I dinna wish to hurt Abigail any more than I already have.” The memory of her tears, of her sobbing, tortured him. She’d only have to look at him, nod for him to follow her, and he’d go. He’d do anything to be with her again. To taste her, smell her, touch her one more time. He ran a hand through his hair and swore. “She leaves with you.”

  “I’m so glad ye came to see us, brother, as we’ve more news for you. We’ve decided to stay for a few months after your wedding. I hope you don’t mind. Of course, anyone who’s my guest is welcome to stay here for that length of time, as well.”

  “Dinna do this, Gwendolyn, or I’ll be forced to remove ye both physically from Druiminn.”

  She laughed, the damn vexing woman. “Don’t be foolish. You wouldn’t dare throw me out. This is the home of my birth, and for as long as I wish, I can stay. ’Tis not my problem you’ll have to tread carefully around your prickly fiancée and the woman you love more than life itself.”

  “We’ll discuss this more in the morn.” Aedan stormed from the room, not caring how much noise he made as he walked to his chamber. He wanted to hit something, hard, make it hurt as much as he did.

  The thought of never being able to be with Abigail wasn’t something he’d ever contemplated, not when she was here, in the flesh, only a corridor away…

  He punched his door, the wood creaking, but little else. His hand was another matter. He looked down at it with little concern. Nor did the outburst of temper do anything to numb how he felt. He’d never survive with Abigail under his roof. Now, at this very moment, his body ached to be with her. To make her his once more and bring pleasure to them both.

  Damn it. Damn it all to hell.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  She was living in a perpetual state of hell. From the moment she’d stepped into medieval Scotland, each tick of the clock hurt every fiber of her being. The following day made it even worse. Aedan’s gaze had followed her about, watching her, wanting her…

  And today would take every strength she possessed not to crumble into a pile of lost hopes and dreams.

  “Aline’s chamber is this way, miss.” A servant pointed to a room on the opposite side of the castle to Aedan’s quarters. Abby didn’t delve into the thought as to why she was housed in the room beside his and not his future wife.

  She knocked and heard Aline beckon her to enter. The room was as spacious as hers, animal furs covered the bed and parts of the floor. Two chairs sat before the roaring fire, and although the room wasn’t warm, it wasn’t chilly like so many others.

  “You wished to see me, Aline?” Abby shut the door, but didn’t venture any farther into the room. She didn’t want to be here in the first place. This woman was the sole reason why she’d never get what her heart wished for. Not that she could blame the woman entirely. Aedan had chosen her, had decided to move on and marry another. The thought brought tears to her eyes and she took a deep breath, less she start blubbering like a fool.

  “Come and sit beside me, Abigail. I’m in need of your advice.”

  “Of course.” Abby sat, folding her hands in her lap. Aline played with the long plait of hair that came over one shoulder. She smiled, and yet the gesture didn’t meet her eyes.

  “I wish to discuss something with ye that is of a personal nature. In fact, there are a couple of things I wanted to know, if you’re willing to discuss them with me, of course.”

  Abby swallowed, not sure if she should agree or not. “I’ll be as honest as I can. What is it you wish to know?”

  “First, I’d like to know why you left Aedan after the battle. You were betrothed. Surely there was no reason to flee Scotland.”

  Abby thought back to the story she and Gwen had come up with. All lies, and yet, they would suit their needs and explain why she was back within their fold. “After the fire, I was called back to the estate where I came from. A sick family member, who eventually passed, God rest her soul, needed me. I couldn’t refuse.”

  “I see.” Aline sighed, the sound contrived. “But, I still don’t see why you would call off your betrothal with Aedan.”

  “When apart, I realized we would not suit. I wrote to him and notified him that my feelings had changed. He was in agreement.” Abby watched as the words pleased Aline, and she mentally cursed the woman for the bitch she was. How Aedan could endure a lifetime with this woman was anyone’s guess. She doubted they’d last, but then, divorce wasn’t an option so… “What is the advice you wish help with?”

  “As to that—” Aline giggled and Abby wanted to scratch her eyes out. “I’d like to know what your opinion is on pre-marital copulation? Aedan and I have known each other for a long time, and there are times when a mere kiss isn’t enough. I know by the feel of him he wishes to do more, when he clasps me hard against his body my own wants nothing more than to be as near to him as I possibly can be. Do you think I should offer him more before our marriage? Would that be too forward? Whoreish even?”

  Abby stared at her a long moment, unable to form words. Aline smiled, the laughter in her eyes telling Abby how much she knew the question hurt. “I think, if it’s what you wish, then you should sleep together. In fact, as you’re already betrothed, I see no harm in it. No one has to know, right?”

  Aline grinned. “That’s right. I’m so glad we’re able to have these chats, Abigail. I feel we didn’t get along when I last st
ayed, but I’m happy we can now be friends. Especially since you’re such close friends with Gwen and she will soon be my family.”

  “I’m happy for you, Aline. I’m sure you will do well with Aedan. He’s a good man.” Abby stood. “I must change before dinner. I’ve been outdoors most of the day.”

  “Of course. And please, do sit at the dais tonight. I wish to speak to you some more.”

  “Thank you, that is very kind.” Abby left quickly, but once outside the room, she held the wall to stop herself from falling. Years stretched ahead of her, of being near Aedan, of hearing about his marriage to Aline, their children, all the while being stuck here, unable to leave, or move forward with her own life until Gwen’s daughter was able to help her.

  “Are ye alright, lass?”

  Her attention snapped up to Aedan who strolled toward her. He was in a kilt, his muscular legs tightened and flexed with each step. He wore no shirt, his torso damp from whatever exercise he’d come from. Her mouth dried and words became impossible.

  “Abigail, lass. Are ye alright?”

  She nodded, but feared her head shook the opposite way to what it was supposed to do. “Of course. I’m heading back to my room. Excuse me.” She went to walk around him and he clasped her arm.

  “Ye dinna look well. Has something happened?”

  Other than your fiancée breaking my heart… “Nothing’s happened. I’ll see you at dinner.”

  He pulled her into an alcove, a long rectangular window at her back. Aedan stood before her, blocking her path of escape. She sighed and skittered back as far as the small space would allow. She didn’t need to be close to him, to have his presence envelop her, consume her, as it always did.

  “Please tell me what has troubled ye. You must know I still care for ye and do not wish to cause ye anymore distress than I already have.”

  The lump was back in her throat. “I know, but truly, let me pass, Aedan. There’s nothing you can do or say that will make this situation any easier for me.” She shrugged, fisting her hands at her side, lest she grab him and force him to kiss her.

  Although by the dangerous look in his gaze, she doubted he’d be a difficult convert. He looked like he struggled with his words, and sighing, he stepped back, giving her the much needed space she craved.

  She stepped past him and headed toward her room. Tears pooled in her eyes, and she again cursed her own stupidity at not looking up Aedan’s history. But then, anger thrummed in her veins with the thought that he couldn’t even wait a measly year for her. And why hadn’t Gwen told him of her plan?

  She changed direction and went to seek out Gwen instead. She had a lot of explaining to do.

  ...

  Gwen was sitting before the fire in her chamber.

  “I was wondering when you’d come to talk to me.” Gwen’s lips lifted in a small smile and she beckoned Abby into the room.

  Abby sat across from her, leaning forward to warm her chilled hands. At least they matched her chilled heart. “Why am I here? I mean, seriously, Gwen. Did you know that Aedan was courting Aline? Had in fact thought to make her his wife?”

  “I knew he was courting her, and I told him that it was a mistake, but knowing my powers were weakened after the fire, he thought ye gone. Before your arrival, I hadn’t thought I could bring you back. All I know is, the moment his betrothal announcement was made, I swore I had to do something to change the course of history. I made an oath that should my daughter have my gift, that I would ensure you were brought back. That my descendants would make it so…” Gwen paused. “And almost as soon as I made the vow, you returned.”

  “I’m stuck here now, Gwen. God knows for how long, probably years, if I have to wait for your daughter to be strong enough to send me back.” Despair crashed over her, and she swiped the tears from her cheek. Damn it, she wasn’t going to cry anymore. She’d cried enough to fill Loch Ness last night.

  “You won’t be going back. You’re Aedan’s soul mate, and ye have to take back what’s yours.”

  The resolve behind Gwen’s voice brooked no argument. “You cannot be serious. I’m not going to break his engagement. As much as I love the guy, I’m not going to sink to that level.” She paused, hating the fact she’d actually thought of this idea herself, but didn’t want to voice it out loud. She needed to keep some sort of moral compass. “And even if I wanted to, contracts have been signed between the clans. I’d probably cause another war, if Aedan chose me.”

  Gwen scoffed. “Aline is not for him. Ye must do something, though I can’t tell you what. I will give you a home should ye wish to leave here, but I’ll not let ye go back to your own time. Your future is here, Abigail. You may not think so now, but ’tis true. Trust in his love, that’s all I ask.”

  “I know he loves me, but as he said, things change. Life sometimes gets in the way of what we wish. He has a duty, Gwen, and I’ll not cause trouble for him, no matter how much I want him to be mine.” She stood, needing air. “I’ll see you later. I’m going for a quick walk before dinner.”

  “Do ye love my brother, Abigail?”

  Abby stopped at the threshold and studied the knots in the oak door. “More than anything in the world.”

  “Then whether the path is right or wrong, you have one to walk. I have faith that people who’re born for one another, will find each other…eventually.”

  Abby left, and hearing the sound of loud voices from the great hall, decided against a walk and went back to her room. She closed the door and leaned against it. The situation was heartbreakingly hopeless.

  ...

  The next day, Abby had Cook make up a small picnic for herself. She wandered about the kitchen while the food was prepared. Two large fires burned and meats rotated above one, while on the other pots with an assortment of fragrances wafted from them. Two tables, L-shaped in their set-out, were covered with plates, cooked pies, and biscuits and apples.

  “Do you leave the food out once it’s cooked or do you have a place to store it?”

  The older woman wiped her hands on her apron, a little flushed from work. “We have a larder my lady, over there,” she said, waving to the opposite side of the room.

  Abby went over to it and peeked inside. It was as warm as the kitchen and probably not the best place for food that required refrigeration. “You should put in an ice room beneath the kitchens, to help keep your perishable food longer and stop it from going bad.”

  The staff in the kitchens stopped and looked at Abby with something akin to bewilderment. “What in all things holy is an ice room?”

  “During the winter you’d collect ice, you could cut it from the top of a frozen loch. You would then place that ice into a stone room, away from heat and light. The ice will remain frozen for a very long time and you could store your meats and milks, things like that, within the ice room, and it’ll keep for a much longer time. At present, you salt your meat quite a lot to preserve it, and that would no longer be necessary.”

  “And have ye seen such an ice room before, my lady? I know I never have.”

  How did Abigail tell them that the ancient Romans had used them for years, and that in archaeological digs, even possibly China. “I have seen them.” Or what was left of such structures on old estates scattered about England. “When you store the ice, you insulate it with straw or sawdust to make it last longer. You should see if the laird would approve one. I think you’d find it a blessing, once you got used to using it.”

  The cook pursed her lips, nodding a little. “Mayhap I’ll think on it and ask the laird when next I speak to him about the kitchens.” She placed the last of her food into a small basket and handed it to Abby. “Here ye are. Enjoy yer day, my lady.”

  “Thank you,” Abby said, heading out the door that led off to the side of the castle. Not too far from the estate she found a secluded tree and sat. Her view overlooked the flowing waterway that ran beside the castle. Picking at a bread roll, her thoughts were far from the beautiful view of the Highlands
that stretched out before her. Aedan, always Aedan, consumed her mind.

  “Gwen told me ye had returned. I had to see for myself what she said was true.”

  Abby turned at the sound of a friendly, familiar voice. “Black Ben.” She laughed. “It’s great to see you again. What brings you back to Castle Druiminn?”

  “My friend and his forthcoming wedding.” He sat and started to rummage through her small basket. “I dinna think to see ye again. I must declare, I’m happy that you’re here.”

  “I wish I could say the same.” Abby poured some wine into her goblet and handed it to him. He downed it in one swallow. How stupid to think she could make a life in this time. She should’ve reminded herself how brutal this time was and stayed in the twenty-first century where she belonged. Not in this time, where marriages between clans moved at lightning speed and people you would’ve trusted with your life let you down.

  “Ye not happy to be back, then? I thought ye’d be right pleased.”

  “I thought I would be, too, but.” She shrugged. It was hard to find words for what she actually felt. Perhaps, there were no words for the despair she found herself in. “I don’t know what I’m doing here, actually. Everything’s buggered up.”

  “I don’t know what ye mean by buggered, but I’m assuming it’s a derogatory term?”

  Somehow, even in her depressed state, Ben managed to make her smile. “Yes, it is.” Abby covered her eyes, hoping that he’d not notice her crying. “He’s going to marry her.” A sob tore free, and Ben placed a comforting arm about her shoulders. She went willingly against, him, seeking comfort for a situation that wasn’t going to change, no matter how much she cried about it.

  “Aye, mayhap he will.” He rubbed her arm. “Dinna fret, lass. All is not lost yet.”

  Abby looked up at Ben, a flicker of hope igniting in her stomach. “What do you mean? Do you know something that I don’t?”

  “Nay. But Aedan is as close as a brother to me, and I’ll not let him make such a mistake without some input into the matter first. Let me talk to him, and we’ll see.”